Sunday, May 30, 2010

i'm getting old.

okay, so my youngest sister nich,
(pronounced like neesh)
graduated high school this weekend.
all three of us are now kinda 'grown up'.
i feel a little old...

here is a good shot of my family.
{from left to right- dane, dave, shelley, nich, si, me, gram and gramps}

nich and her friends.
they make me laugh...

nichel and her best friend, arie.

k2 surprised us from california...
we had fun taking some pictures while waiting for
nichel to come out.

do i look scary enough for you?

i love this picture.
they were laughing so hard.

happy graduation nich!
mmm. love ya so much.

Tuesday, May 25, 2010

who makes you sing?

do you ever have days where you just need to sing?
maybe, it's because the rain is falling softly and a michael buble song is playing, oh so calmly, in your head... perhaps, it is because this day or the night before this day, or the thought of such a day...brings you hope. big hope. small hope. it's hope all the same. or is it more than hope? is it a reason? a reason to believe in love. a reason to believe in beauty....a reason to let yourself sing.
andy davis will play about love being bigger than us all. you should listen to the words and join him. some may call you a romantic, others may call you a child. but ask youself,
who makes you want to sing?
who is the one that brings music to your life?...that leaves your stomach feeling like it's experiencing a sudden vertical drop? and that drives you to listen to every sappy neil young love song there is? so true neil, love is a rose. maybe this is the one that will twirl you around in the kitchen, and slowly pull you closer to the voice of ray charles, 'you don't know me'.
and you'll sing along. because he makes you want to sing. once again, you smile. once more, you stare at the ceiling in simple joy as you attempt to sleep. you can only pray, pray with all you've got that this time around, that this time...love will win. for once again, you sing.
i like to sing.

Saturday, May 22, 2010

we were destined.

me + 80's toyota land rover = undying love.
i've loved these things for years & years.
and a couple days ago...i was driving to work and there it was.
(this is not an actual picture of it, but one very similar)
i pass it every day, with it's lovely little 'for sale' sign.
so tempting.

imagine driving down a desert road.
listening to neil young.
in an 80's toyota land rover.
such a beautiful thought.

why do i love old people in love?

last night i went to see a friend perform in salt lake.
it was a fantastic show.
they performed a variety of show tunes, broadway hits,
and simple classics... during one of the love ballads,
the elderly man sitting next to me reached over and
grabbed his wife's hand, giving it a little squeeze.
she moved in closer to him, and they continued watching
the show.
oh, what a good tune and a squeeze of the hand can
say to someone you love.
one day i will be old. and i will relive that moment.
....
in the meantime, feel free to listen to this song.

Friday, May 21, 2010

a white horse or something.

there once was a time, a lovely, special time...
when i trusted in my own
heart.
during this time,
i was not afraid to
fight for love.
in fact, i welcomed the challenge with courage.
my
heart did the leading.
my mind simply followed.
but then the day came when i no longer had
such faith in
the clarity of love.
and i realized, i was
tired of fighting.
tonight, i took a long walk at
midnight...
thinking of the feelings i felt.
i thought i could
sit back and wait for the man,
the one on the
white horse or something.
the girls say, that he will
sweep me away.

but then i realized....

you see.
i'm just not that
type.
i don't like to have things
handed to me.
and i don't expect to be
swept away.
i fight for the
things that i love. i always have.
and i fight for what i want.
and i think that is how it is going to sta
y.

Thursday, May 20, 2010

love boat captain.

dear universe,
today, please bring me color.
with love,
keen.

"love boat captain
take the reigns and steer us towards the clear... here.
it's already been sung, but it can't be said enough.
all you need is love..
hold me, and make it the truth.
that when all is lost there will be you,
cause to the universe i don't mean a thing
and there's just one word i still believe..."

-pearl jam, love boat captain

Wednesday, May 19, 2010

erin visits utah.

my dear erin came to visit this past weekend.
{she's my very smart best friend that is in dental school}


we had a really good time.
it made me miss all the past adventures we had.

{we lived together for three years}

here we are, together once more.
sadly, we're just missing aubry.

{who, as you know, is currently on a mission}

erin, emily and jess.

we went to macaroni grill and then
proceeded to get some frozen yogurt...


the next day we went up to temple square, which was
so beautiful.

me and erin.

of course, we managed to squeeze in a 2a.m.
del taco run...for old times sake.
some kneaders french toast the following morning...
yes, this is just the way we live.

we then spent the afternoon shopping
and at sundance.




these are pictures of my ancestors up at sundance...
yeah, we could have been rich.

and then the visit came to an end
with one of my favorite provo landmarks.



erin, we love you.
miss you already....

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

pardon my heart.

lately i've had a bit of an obsession with art.
here are some of my top finds.

{all can be found on etsy}
i love the simplicity and fresh colors in this painting,
entitled heartbroken but still with hope.

charming, right?
entitled black horse.

i'm 100% in love with this piece.
entitled rescue of a seaworthy creature.
it reminds me of a dear friend of mine.

this one is entitled unicorn mask...
who wouldn't want to be able to put on a mask that looks
like a one-horned-horse-like imaginary creature?


and i think this one speaks for itself.
pretty awesome. makes me want to fly.

p.s. this song gives me hope...

Friday, May 14, 2010

let me give the world to you.

dear this day,
last night i had a
dream. and when i woke up,
i thought the dream was
real.
i kind of love that.

and this song came up on my i-tunes...

"last chance to make believe in,
always and all it seems.
train wrecks hide underneath your umbrella.
set the frame
destiny, on this first name soliloquy.
tired symphonies played downward,
let me give the world to you, my love...
let me show you what I'm thinking of
."

-smashing pumpkins

p.s. another bookshelf to die for.

Wednesday, May 12, 2010

an okay lie.

i asked the old man with the bowtie,
how are you today?
he responded, 'it's another day. and i'm doing wonderful.'
well, i replied...
that is certainly good to hear.
'yes,' the man with the bowtie continued...
"i refuse to be any other way."
that is admirable... i told him sincerely.
'well, sometimes i have to lie to myself,'
he said with a laugh,
'but i figure that's an okay lie."

i agreed.

and then neil young's song played in my head...
although the answer is not unknown.
i'm searchin. i'm searchin.
and how i've grown...

-world on a string

p.s. i'd love to have this poster framed on my wall
one day...it's fantastic, wouldn't you agree?

Monday, May 10, 2010

to mom. from keen.

i know this is a little late, but i have a few things to say about my mom... first of all, i need to say thank you, because i definitely do not tell her enough. you see, my mom is one of the most selfless mother's in all of the world. for as long as i can remember, she has never put herself first. it's always been about scrounging up enough money to give us the dance lessons we wanted or buying us those pink velcro shoes we simply couldn't live without. sure, they meant a tighter budget for her the next month but seeing us happy has always been a top priority for mom. and for that, i thank you shelley.

my mom doesn't let me leave the house without making sure that i know she loves me. i will never be able to say that my mom didn't love me, because she's probably told me a million times. nothing is impossible for me in my mothers eyes. i can be anything. i can do anything. i am the best. she never lets me believe i'm a failure, even when i fail. my mom has always given us confidence, courage, and belief in ourselves and our capabilities. thank you mom.

from nights of crying myself to sleep over some boy...to moments of being a crazy fifteen year-old girl ready to fight about anything and everything...to attempting in the third grade to wear hard contact lenses (this was a surprisingly traumatic experience in my life. lets just leave it with saying that i definitely stick to my beloved soft contact lenses)...to evenings out with the girls eating chocolate reeses peanut butter cup shakes- my mom has always been there for me. she's put up with my ridiculous crap. she's loved me even when i'm a snob. she's taught me about being a classy, confident...spiritual woman, and a caring, loving and dedicated mother.

dear mom,

you are truly the best. i hope to one day be even a small portion of the mother that you've been to us. we look up to you, admire you, and love you!

love, keen.


p.s. thanks for signing me up for that reading class at grosmont college with the crazy lady when i was little...i still remember it. and thanks for telling me that i could get the part in the nutcracker ballet if i just went out there with a smile and show them how great i was...even though i really was actually kind of bad at ballet. love you mom.