the word is out: i'm not perfect.
i know, right? what the h.
in fact, i'm so far from perfect that 'perfect' probably can't even see the three zits that have oh-so-gracefully appeared on my struggling chin.
but hey now. hey. my goal was never to pose as a perfect human being.
sure. sometimes i like to think i am cooler than i am. but then i wake up and realize that only in my dreams do i have the wit of conan o'brien, the charm (and bad-a dance moves) of ellen degeneres and the unbeatable looks of brooklyn decker.
and with dreams like that-- waking up is not easy my friends (totally kidding. i wake up just fine. unless i don't. then i hit snooze like ten times.)
it's a cold-hard-truth-telling-slap-in-the-face kind of world dearies.
and frankly, i'm not a supermodel. shocking, i know. brooklyn, i guess you're on your own on this one. and though my sense of humor is pretty darn impressive (toot, toot)...it's not impressive enough to have my own late night show on tbs (oh, conan).
as for ellen, i can't even go there. she rocks. that woman is seriously my favorite.
it's hard to compete with 'perfect'.
but who says we have to?
i mean, besides it being thrown in our face by every media portal known to mankind...
i'm just not cut out to be 'that girl'.
i'm just me. that's kristen to some. kris to others. and keen to you.
perfect in my book is managing to get through the day without swearing out-loud or in some form under my breath (kidding. kind-of.)
seriously though, i swore in deseret industries a couple days ago. i mean, who does that!? (it was a low-point of the week.)
perfect in my world is having a clean kitchen stay clean for any amount of time over thirty minutes. i try not to expect too much more than that.
it's having an organized, tidy bedroom with a closet that looks like japan after tsunami 2011 (too far? ok.)
but hey, the closet doors can be shut. no one has to know.
perfect is never following the 'no carbs before bed' rule. never. ever. heck, my favorite bed time snacks are mainly carb-based.
it's treating yourself to a very-chocolatey-chippy-kneaders-cookie after a really long, painful day.
and seriously, just drink that diet coke when you're suffering from a caffeine headache. sip that down, guilt-free. i mean really, who cares. it's my choice to enjoy that chemically-zero-calorie beverage (and you better believe i'll run half-marathon's while i continue to love it).
it the words of my best-friend's mom "life just isn't worth living without my diet coke."
perfect in these parts is seeing tangled in 3-d once again at the dollar theater and quoting it all night long.
and listening to the same pearl jam song--black--over and over again. yes, i have been for a couple days now. it's like a drug. i can't stop.
as eddie says, "all the love gone bad turned my world to black.' love is not perfect. but perfect is loving. and all that love entails...like hashing out differences and experiencing each others' best and worst-selves.
i'm the troubled girl that gets jealous over silly things. often 'crosses the line'. completely adores the movie 'lars and the real girl' (sidenote: it totally baffles me that no one else EVER likes this insanely-cool movie...it's soooooo good) and may get just a little too much enjoyment out of confrontation.
yes, that's me: miss-imperfect-kris.
judge me. love me. whatev.
perfect to me means having no clear understanding of the past, present or future. nope, no-understanding-what-so-ever is required.
this life is not about perfect. this world is about learning. it's about loving. it's about the little-imperfect-things that make it laughable.
like having turbo kick class kick by butt, watching my hair do nothing i want it to, and feeling bloated for like a week straight.
yup, perfectly perfect. deciding to stay home and watch full house re-runs instead of going to the gym. and going crazy in the car as i dance to 's and m' by rihanna (listen here.)
na, na, na, na. come on, come on, come on.
i guess what it all comes down to is that i'm tired of feeling like i always have to do better. why not just embrace life the way it is? within reason, of course.
we'd get nowhere in this beast-of-a-journey if we never sought after improvement (and trust me, i full-heartedly, 100% believe in making your own success and chasing after whatever it is you want in this life)....
but why not let some of the little things go? (i know what you're thinking, 'look whose talking'. the queen of not wanting to let the little stuff go. the master of repeating herself again and again. and the all-time reigning champion of worrying about anything and everything.)
and i mean it.
in the words of one of my professors, "life is tough. take an excedrin and move on."
we're not super-models. and who cares.
perfect is ____________________ (you fill in the blank).
and while you're thinking about that, you can listen to the unplugged version of black here. (and i would have sent you to the actual 'unplugged' video, but there was some kind of offensive language on the 'comment' section of the only video i could find. so this one is just a recording.)