Friday, December 2, 2011

awww december. my ol' friend.

this month gives me goosebumps.


it's in the air. it's down the streets. it's practically humming christmas tunes through the winds (which are ridiculously strong right now--anyone living in the western united states knows what i'm talking about)

you see, i'm not one for expectations. in fact, i despise them. unrealistic attitudes and foresight's all-too-often lead to someone being let down or hurt. or disappointed.

i avoid run-in's with mr. disappointment at all costs.

yeah yeah. don't judge me. i know there is about a million and one sayings out there going on about not being afraid to fail. to take a big leap...hoping to fly. and then you'll end up inventing a light bulb or becoming the next steve jobs or something.

and those are great. honestly, they are.

but i try to balance those out with my realist philosophies that life is the way it is. we know from experience that if we decide we're going to loose twenty pounds in one week and be a millionaire by next tuesday...we're probably going to fall short.

i know right, sucky realism.

because when it comes down to it, i could all-together stop eating from here on out. and i still wouldn't loose twenty pounds by next friday. and i could totally work my a** off and enter my name into every cash prize drawing in the western united states...and i think we all know i'm not going to be a millionaire by tuesday.

i'm sorry. this is probably like being told there is no santa clause for all of you "the secret" believers out there. and--hey--maybe i'm wrong.

it's just the ridiculous expectation thing that really gets me.

the exact reason why i choose to not celebrate valentines day.

don't get me wrong--i'm as hopelessly romantic as the next girl down the line--but the celebrating of sugar-candied-truffle-box-of-high-expectations-and-unresolved-relationship-insecurities-holiday is just not my thing.

it makes me feel ridiculously uncomfortable just thinking about it. bleeeeh.

being required to show someone, through some grand gesture--that outdoes all the other 'grand gestures'--on the oh-so-coveted february 14th, that you really, truly, deeply, madly love them.


why not just do something special for that someone on a random tuesday or wednedsday or friday? or delight her with a clean house when she arrives home from a long day? or schedule a saturday out for him golfing with his buddies while you watch the kids?

that's the stuff that i consider 'not-eeeeeky'.

the cheeseball-i'm-only-gonna-do-this-once-a-year-so-eat-it-up-and-swallow-it-down-with-a-crystal-glass-of-high-expectations thing.

yeah. i opt out of that one.

yeah yeah, so i have issues with setting the bar too high. but it's true. it's easier in many situations (not all but many) to just lower your expectations and find yourself pleased later on.

that's why i hesitate in saying this...but something about december always leaves me expecting something magical (insert twinkling noises)

kinda like this picture.

and no--not necessarily love related.

it doesn't really have to pertain to any certain genre. the only category that it has to fit into is a moment of 'magical'.

whether it's being swept down a curb in a darling dress coat and kitten heels by the hunky-man-of-your-dreams. or watching it softly snow while you sit bundled up with some steamy raspberry hot cocoa in a perfect little mug.

or watching that beautiful new baby boy slowly grow into his own features. week by week. looking more and more like his parents everyday.

maybe it's a moment with old friends visiting. or a brief couple of seconds where that stranger opens the door for you and exclaims--with so much joy it almost rings like a holiday melody--'merry christmas!'

perhaps it's feeling some life run through your veins. maybe falling in love. or a moment of adrenaline as you think of all the possibilities to be found in the upcoming year.

the thought of a second chance.

the inclination to make something right. the desire to serve others around you. the passion that this time of year illuminates within each and every one of us.

mmmmgh, yeah.

magic, i tell ya.


so with every high expectation i've ever had. with every broken bar of what "i thought" something was going to be. and with every fear i have of wanting something to be more than it was destined to amount to.

to this december, i say...

may you be the most inspiring and magical december yet.


p.s. i just added a 'join this site' button on the right column. i decided to make it slightly easier to follow my blog. ha ha. #behindiknow


  1. This just gave me the goosebumps! I love this time of year! YAY!

  2. I think one of the most beautiful moments in life is when you don't have anymore expectations. All you really wish is 'for everything to work out'. And reality becomes your expectation. And then living becomes a lot more exciting, like it was meant to be. And then life becomes like that line from Jack Johnson "You know this livin' is not so hard as it seems". These words are good keen, christmas good. Like muddy buddies, christmas story 24 hour marathon, college football bowl season, no school, christmas eve dinner good. Well done.

  3. I had a stranger do the same thing for me the other day! Probably made my week. That is the true spirit of Christmas. Thanks for this post!

  4. Thanks Em! And Aaron...muddy buddies, christmas story and christmas eve dinners are some of my favorite things in this world.

  5. mmmmm... gave me chills. perfection.
    very keen statements keen.

  6. Magical and realistic. That was pretty darn cool.


from keen.